Urgent Prayer Request:

Just found out that my 86 year old Father-in-law Pa Bear, er, excuse me, Don Roth is in the hospital and has been in there for 6 days. It started out as a Bladder Infection and it has turned for the worse. He was supposed to have been transferred to a hospital in Yakima for Rehab. As soon as I can get my hubby awake and dressed we are on our way to see him in CCU.

He has had so much happen to him in such a short time. First he had open heart surgery to try a pig valve but it failed. Then he got a pacemaker put in. Then last year he had brain surgery to remove an 80ml blood clot. Then he had a foot of his intestine removed.

This is not the first Bladder infection he has had. But from what they say he is not doing well at all.

I know that at this point it seems that he has just given up on living. He has battled so hard.
I would love to see his suffering to end peacefully. There are mixed feelings in the family right now. This is especially hard on my mother-in-law Ma Bear, er, excuse me Dot Roth as she is still trying to adjust to living on her own in the next town over.

So could you please pray for us.

What a couple of weeks....

Well, I am so sorry I have not been posting lately but I have had doctor appointment after appointment  and that is not even mentioning just how ill I have been as of late.

*Good News for now*

I went to see Dr. MacDonald on the 20th and he told me that my Enchondroma is Benign for now but he wants to keep an eye on it for the next 6 months to make sure there is no growth. So I go back in 6 months to get two more MRI's to see.

Meanwhile, I am having a Mammogram and an ultrasound due to a lump and a swelling I have on the right side just below my breast. It hurts like a dickens and I am having trouble getting comfy in bed now because of it. It seems to be right on the bottom rib. I have been so drained of energy, stamina, and pain has zapped all my physical strength. 

So ya'll, can I ask for ya'll to pray for me. We can really use it since I have run out of my Vitamin D3 and we cannot afford to get it being without it has left me with blind spots in my left eye and a horrid buzzing that started in my right foot and is slowly creeping up my legs each time I have to go without my D3 and I am out of my eye drops as well. Being without the D3 has left me terribly grumpy and I have been fighting with my husband but I think a big portion of my anger is stemming from my uncontrolled ADD.

 I broke down and wept today missing my family terribly  since they rejected me and took my daughter and son away from me when I was only trying to do the right thing. I wept for my children who I love so dearly even though they chose to listen to the lies my mother had told them.. I wept for missing my parents even though they have disowned me, because no matter how much they neglected my needs they are still my parents and I do love them dearly, it is just that they have taken their eyes off of Jesus and that they have never dealt with their own issues before having children. In fact, the day I was born my father was busy getting drunk at the GI Club on the base where I was born. My mother went through it all alone, yet she stayed with him for reasons I cannot assume. When he was home he was a workaholic. He was a prison guard. As you may assume at this moment I did not have a very happy childhood. It was mostly full of fear when I was going to get picked up and thrown on the bed next and I dare not repeat what he had done to me but even to this day I am scared of my mother and father. It finally quit when I was 12 years of age when I finally got brave enough to pull my father's bluff down while I was in class one day. I will forever be grateful for my Friend Christina who went home and told her mother what I had said standing in the Recess Line. Thank you immensely, Christina F. You will forever be my heroine, Thank You {{{hugz}}}.

 I wept for my brother , my only brother who is going to be in prison for the next 20 years. I love him dearly but I also suffered tragic losses and I weep for them every single day. I miss my niece and two nephews dearly. Especially my brother's son. His half-aunt who adopted him has refused for him to have anything to do with me just because I am my brother's sister. I did not commit the crime  and believe me, I grieve every day. I miss not only them but I miss my brother, he will never be the same again. I can only pray that he will continue on the positive path he has started on but I do pray that he will at least write me back. I love him and I miss him dearly. But he is living proof of what trying to Self-Medicate yourself  instead of reaching our to the help you can get can do. So I pray for all the family members of people like my brother. 

So if you are reading this and you just happen to live in Hutchinson, Kansas and so happen to know my parents H.E. Jones III and J. A. B. Jones please tell them I love them dearly and I want us to come full circle with "a circle that is unbroken". Tell them I said to drop their pride and to give me a call (509) 306*9696 please? That I have only love and forgiveness for both of them. As well as open arms. I understand that both of them are just hurting people and that they need help beyond themselves. The same goes for my Children A.B. Jones and C.A. Berg.

 Oh, how I long to just hold them in my arms again before I die. To be honest, I don't think I have much time left because of my health being in such poor shape, but I am trying to hold on as long as I can and I know that I will not die before God says it's time, but man is my body in a very bad way.

Please also pray that Child Support does not take our only vehicle since they now have got a lien against it. I truly need a lawyer but we cannot afford one and we need a new van so desperately as this one is on it's last wheel.

Well, I gotta run and try to get things cleaned up before the maintenance man comes to change out our shower head.


Until Next Time,
A desperate woman hanging on to her last fraying  thread and losing her hope, Karen

Sorry For the Lack of My Presence Online Lately

I want to apologize to those who do follow me for my lack of presence lately. I have really been in a lot of physical pain.

I have also received the worst medical report from my doctor and well,  to be completely honest, I have been grieving the loss of my life as others continue to move forward as though my life does not or has never existed. But even though I feel this way, I want to respond as God would have me to respond..

While it is true that I have not had any encouragement for most of my life in any area of my life, I realize that humans can never be what I need them to be because we live in a Fallen World still ruled by the enemy. So I will be my own Encourager.

But I can come right out and ask for what we need, and then trust all the consequences to God.

1. I need handwritten encouragement in the form of cards as I am trying to build myself an Encouragement file.

2. I need those who are able in our lives to come forward and to meet the needs we have that they are able to meet.
          1. A Comfortable bed. Maybe you cannot do this for us but you may know someone who can. So just getting the word out would help us.
          2. Encouragement for my husband and myself as we are, in reality, facing this alone with the Exception of God being for us. A Daily visit or an email would be really nice.
          3. A minivan as ours is no longer truly reliable to get us from point A to point B. This is where we have had to trust God for our safety. I need reliable transportation to get me to my doctor's appointments.
          4. Prayer for numerous Breakthroughs in our lives. Finances, Medical Insurance for myself, For our Marriage to be strengthened, For My Healing, For God to place people in our lives who will truly be there for us and who are truly for us and not just with us, For my Major Depression and PTSD,
       

These just to name a few of our most urgent needs.

I know that God has a good plan for my future!
Regardless of how dark and dank it feels right now.

Until Next Time,
Karen